Dear Person: I forgive you 

Dear Person,

I refuse to write your name because although this letter is specifically written  just for you, I don’t need people to know who you are. 

I just want to say that I forgive you. I forgive you for making me feel inferior. The feeling of hating myself and not being able to get up from bed because the thought of seeing you terrified me.

I pretended we were friends for a long time. At times you manipulated me in to thinking I was wrong and crazy. That everything I believed was wrong. People started to look at me funny and I didn’t know why. 

I was 7 and you started whispering to your friends about me, laughing. Never included me in anything in class or the playground. Blamed me for the things that we both know I didn’t do. 

Remember that time I fell and cut my hands. I had to lie to my mum about falling. About the bruises. I faked I was ill because school was torture. 

But then it got to the stage I was so used to you hurting me,I stopped caring. Standing at the back was so much easier. Hiding in the background.  If I couldn’t be seen, the bullying would stop. But how wrong was I?  I was wrong about everything. 

Leaving you behind was supposed to be the best thing. But somehow you followed me everywhere. There were more people who wanted me to blend in to the background. More you. More pain.  More lying. Until I stopped existing.  

Taiba x

3 Comments

  1. 1weekmary

    March 5, 2017 at 7:22 pm

    I love this post, I’m genuinely so happy I found your blog! It’s amazing that you can open up now & talk about the past, including the hard bits & just goes to show how much you’ve grown which I think is a real sign of maturity. Looking forward to checking out more of your blog xxx

    1. Taiba

      March 5, 2017 at 7:23 pm

      This is such a sweet comment. Thank you, I really appreciate it x

  2. Saraallie

    March 17, 2017 at 3:53 am

    Just came across your blog and this if the first entry I am reading … needless to say I loved reading this! Stay strong and look up, bullies can only be that: BULLIES. But you, you can be fearless, happy, strong, positive, and confident. That’s so many things!
    Always believe in yourself and never let anybody look you down!

    I’d love to keep in touch <3

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